Thank you Insomnia!

I bet I've accomplished more today, at 6:45am, than some of you will accomplish all day! :P Oh, and on 4 hours of sleep! I woke up at 3:24am, wide eyed and bushy tailed. After tossing and turning for 30 minutes or so I decided to get up and do some homework! That should have put me to sleep, right? I read two VERY dry pharmacology chapters and took two quizzes! Attempted to go back to bed around 5:15. No luck. SO I went on a run!

Yesterday I ran 0.84 miles without stopping to walk. Today I did exactly 1 mile, I am pretty sure I could have kept it up, but I wanted a nice even number to work with tomorrow.

So, here's the exciting part of this post. It's pretty dark at 6am, I started my run, literally 30 seconds into it I busted my ass. Completely wiped out on the sidewalk. I'm sitting there, collecting my thoughts. I was thinking, "Well, this is freaking great," because my ankle was hurting at the time, and this huge, scary black dog starts charging at me, snarling his teeth and barking! Thank God he was on a lead. I jumped up, fight-or-flight response activated, and I told the dog, "Okay, I'll leave!" Not even sure why I said that, it just slipped out. If you're still reading, I apologize, I know this is not as terribly interesting as my UTI post.  

So, on another note. I had a great time last night celebrating with a dear friend. Check out my album with photos of the night. I was geeking out with the camera, don't hate. 

One more time with feeling

Try it again, breathing's just a rhythm 

Say it in your mind until you know 

The words are right 

Hoookay, so. Fucking kangaroos. Fire ze missiles! Anyway, not anyways, just FYI. REGARDLESS not irregardless.  

Anyway. I have a couple of short term goals for myself this week: 1) No drinking until the weekend. My birthday is this coming Monday, December 5th! I'll be 25. If you love me, or just like me enough to put up with me for a night, you should have a beer with me this weekend! 2) I am going to attempt to not be on my phone 24/7. It's getting kind of bad, my battery dies before I even make it home from work. Today I am planning on giving it up cold turkey! Going to leave it off and in my purse until lunch. Check it at lunch, and not look at it again until I leave work. Let's see how that goes. 

So, I've been up since 3:24. Did homework, ran a mile, now I'm going to go play nurse until 7pm. My bed better be warm and ready for me around 8 and my body better let me sleep! Good day good sirs! 

Happy gobble-gobble day.

I am not sure if this is going to sound bizarre or not, but when I woke up this morning it felt like a holiday. It's probably just some sort of conditioning I've had since day one, but it feels different than a normal day. Maybe because everything is closed, no one is at work, I'm not really sure. It just feels different.

I'm actually feeling a little down today. The past year has been a little difficult to deal with. Moving back and forth across the country, spending a crap-ton of money, finding a job, going back to school, and all of the the personal mumbo-jumbo that has been tied in there too. This might sound silly, but out of everything I've had going on, I really stinkin' miss my sister.

The above photo was taken in Napa Valley, California. It was before noon, and we were in a sky lift, leaving Sterling Vineyard, and had a little too much wine. 

I feel so boring. I do not do anything spontaneous or silly or some other word to describe random-late-night-drunken trips to the beach to watch the sunrise.

When is the last time you were sitting on a couch, on your porch, like a redneck, at 3 in the morning, because everyone you lived with worked nights, AND decided to drive to the coast to drink some good ole silver bullets and watch the sunrise? Please forgive me for the excessive run-on sentence, but it's the only way I could describe the reasoning. I hate this word, but that really was an epic night. We saw a fin and chased peacocks! If you have not watched that video, I strongly suggest that you do. 

Here's another good one: I want to laugh like this again. So, pretty much, if I have a least 3 days off in a row in December I'm going to Minnesota. Going to freeze my ass off, but it will be worth it. I miss you AMANDA MAE! 

Problem 1: burning on urination, frequency, urgency, lower abdominal pressure, onset 1 day.

The focus of this post is going to be urine, antibiotics and Foley catheters. You were warned. Stop reading now if you think you're going to be grossed out, because I have no shame. Continue reading if you're a freak and enjoy popping zits, or picking your nose, or something equally gross that you would not want to publicly admit to. Don't lie, we all do it, and you know it gives you some sort of weird satisfaction.

ANYWAY, I've noticed trends of random crap happening lately. I know, that sounds really vague, let me attempt to put it into perspective: The post I wrote last night about texting, I have seriously had conversations with multiple people on that topic in the past couple of weeks, never really discussed it too much before, but all of a sudden it's been this hot topic. Urine related issues have also been trending big in my little world lately. 

People, particularly old people, get UTIs (urinary tract infections) all of the freaking time. Lately I've noticed that people's pee-pee issues have been a little more complex than usual. My first observation of this theory happened a couple of weeks ago when a patient came in with rigors, or chills/shakes from a crazy high fever. This guy's temperature was 106.5 (that's after liquid Tylenol and ibuprofen, 1 liter of fluid, getting him naked and packing his armpits and groin with ice packs) when he left the office via EMS. I freaking thought he was going to seize on us. ANYWAY he had pyelonephritis, or a kidney infection. URINE URINE URINE.

The next week this older lady came in with mental status changes. The person who influenced this post brought her back. ;) We ended up straight catheterizing her because she was not able to urinate, her urine was straight pus. Looked like freaking coffee creamer. We really should have put a Foley in now that I am thinking about it, oh well, sure they did at the hospital. Oh, I am not sure how many older women's junk you've personally seen, but umm, it's a little confusing. Things are not where they are suppose to be, just FYI. 

AND today I put a Foley in some old dude with BPH (benign prostate hyperplasia, or an enlarged prostate) AND last week I slapped one in a woman who had not voided in 10 hours after having a cystoscopy (endoscopy of the bladder). Dude, I've never seen urine pour out of someone so fast, poor lady. I've had this job for nine months, and in the last 2 weeks I've shoved more tubes up people's pee holes than I have the entire time I've work there!

It's an epidemic!

If you made it through all of that, here's the fun part of my post: I freaking have a UTI. I'm assuming my slightly excessive amount of beer consumption, plus my equally excessive amount of coffee consumption, you know to counter-act the next day effects of the beer lead to this. Freaking diuretics. Today was particularly bad. I did not go to sleep until 3am, had to be up at 6:45. Worked, busy as fuck. Had multiple cups of coffee, no water. Think I only took a pee break once until 4pm or so. That's when the dreaded urgency and burning hit me! Holy freaking crap, if you've never had one of these bad boys, it freaking sucks. You pee and as soon as you finish you feel like you have to go again. Oh, and it comes out in dribbles. Horrible. 

After the UTI discovery, I freaking started my period. TWO WEEKS EARLY. WTF. Get this, last week I had a yeast infection from all of the Doxycylcline (antibiotic) I've been taking for this stupid acne. I feel tainted. My junk is dying. I feel like shit. I have a low grade fever, my lower back is killing me, there is all this pressure in my lower abdomen, I keep running to the restroom every 10 minutes. FUCK.

Now taking Macrobid. Freaking expensive, $42 at Sweetbay. Oh, and Diflucan, going to kill off that yeast before it freaking grows out of control again. I've popped so many pills tonight, feel like I am going to puke. Also took acidophilus, cranberry extract, ibuprofen and Azo. Chugging water. So glad I am off tomorrow, hopefully I'm better before my dinner date with Heather and Sean. I've missed those two and I was really looking forward to hitting up downtown Deland. Wish the camera I ordered was here already, Deland is a cute old town and tomorrow would have made a good photo op. :( 

Enough rambling. Hope you enjoyed my pee story. LATERZ YO. Word.

I have dreams of Orca whales and owls, but I wake up in fear.

She was lying on the floor counting stretch marks,

She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a God.

-Regina Spektor Braille

Good evening. I know everyone knows this, but I would totally have Regina Spektor's babies. You know, if that were possible. She's gorgeous, creative, has an amazing voice, quirky, great pianist, silly, perfect. I sound like a creeper. She's definitively my number one celebrity crush. <3

My love for Regina was not the inspiration for this post. I've noticed a trend in conversations lately, the past couple of weeks in particular: texting etiquette. Everyone seems to have varying opinions as to what is acceptable when it comes to texting. Those opinions can really drive some people bonkers, myself included. 

I am the 99%. Meaning I reply to texts, 99% of the time. Exceptions for not replying: 1) If I receive a text while I'm sleeping, and I check it and forget that someone texted me. 2) If I am doing something important, like saving lives. :P 3) If I just do not want to talk to you.

To me, texting is a simple and easy way to communicate. There's not much commitment to a text. I sometimes, well a lot of the time, deny phone calls and immediately text the person. For varying reasons: sometimes I really like the song I am jamming out to in my car, or I'm at work, or I just do not want to talk. Texting is the perfect form of communication for me because I avoid a lot of the foot in mouth situations I tend to find myself in. 

Let me get back on track. The conversation to the left is how I personally prefer my texting endeavors to go. Back and forth. 

I'm a texting queen, so is the other person in this example conversation. Taking that into consideration, we have similar views on the deeper meaning of texting etiquette. For instance, neither of us have a problem texting when we are at dinner together; which I am sure other people would find pretty rude, but we are the 99%, we reply! 

It seems that the non-queens-of-texting view a text as an informative notice that does not require a reply. I personally think these people are going to fizzle out ASAP.

Anyway, point being: It's kind of crazy that I posting about texting etiquette, it's also kind of crazy that so many people, including myself, even my mother, get hot and bothered on the time it takes someone to reply to a text. I am so sick of typing text. TEXT TEXT TEXT SEXT TEXT!

One more text reference: I am blaming that featured conversation for disrupting my circadian rhythm! Now I'm awake at 1:20am, have to be up at 6:30am and work and it's Monday. Monday's are typically busy, busy, busy. AND I'm working in The Villages. JOY.

That's it. I need some sleepytime. Considering the contents of this post were quite boring, I could probably just reread this entry and put myself to sleep. :P

RANT alert.

This is going to be a rant about school. I need to vent and I do not think anyone particular cares enough to listen, so I am going to blog about it instead.

I'm working on a Health Sciences Pre-Clinical Track degree at UCF. That's the name they came up with, not me. A little too wordy for my liking. Anyway this is the description of the degree:


The Bachelor of Science degree in Health Sciences Pre-Clinical Track is designed for students with interest in human health leading to graduate study or career advancement. This degree is designed to provide the students with a solid educational background in basic and health-related sciences, while providing the foundation courses required for admission to graduate level clinical programs in health professions including but not limited to physical therapy, physician assistant, and occupational therapy. The flexibility of this program allows students to prepare for 
multiple careers in health science


Oh, so exciting, huh?

I feel like this is going to take forever. Fortunately I already have some of the credits for this degree, you know, thanks to my two associates degrees from LSCC. Blah, I hate that, wasted too much time at a community college because I could not figure out exactly what I wanted to do.

Anyway, I need to take 4 science classes: Chemistry I & II and Physics I & II. All of these classes are 4-5 credit hours, and considering how I failed miserably attempting to take Chemistry this semester I think I will only take each one of those classes with one other class a semester. I warned you that this was going to be a ramble. I also need 6 more "Core Requirements" and 7 "Restrictive Electives". So that's 17 classes and approximately 51 credit hours.

Oh my gawd, this is seriously going to take forever. If I want to go to grad school after this it is going to take even longer, which is what I want to do. I plan on taking 2-3 classes each semester, including the summer from now until forever. I've been trying to register for classes all morning BUT unfortunately they are all freaking full. I want to take the sciences at LSCC as a transient student because they are cheaper and have smaller class sizes BUT I owe $10 for a parking ticket and cannot figure out how to pay it online.

I really want to scream. Just added that lovely photo of myself. No make-up, zits and PJs with a book in my lap, perfect for this post. I have that exact outfit on at the moment. Odd.

Now I need to shower and do Macroeconomics homework. JOY!

And when you're holding me, we make a pair of parentheses.

It's update time, you can't touch this.

I am not sure if I was insanely hungry, but I just devoured this Lean Cuisine frozen Santa Fe style rice and beans. Oh em gee, I'm satisfied. My stomach is talking a little too much for my comfort though. :(

So, I know that was exciting news! This is even better: since September I have either worked both Saturday and Sunday OR Saturday or Sunday. That sentence does not flow well, but go with it. Here's the exciting stuff: I am off this weekend!

AND

I just don't know what to do with myself,
I don't know what to do with myself.

-The White Stripes 

Gotta make sure I keep up on my song references for Blake. :P


So yeah, I actually have a weekend that will not involve lavaging ears, accidentally splashing myself in the face with smelly UTI urine, OR getting boil juice on me. Right on. 


Ear lavages are probably the most dreaded thing to do at my job. I think everyone finds ear wax absolutely disgusting. Everyone probably, well hopefully, even finds their own ear wax disgusting.

Now imagine a complete stranger, male, 68 years old with hair all over his greasy ears and he tells you "I think my ears are clogged." Your stomach drops, you're hoping, praying, that when you take a look in his ears you see his pretty little ear drum staring back at you. You don't, instead you see a brown wall of wax were his ear drum should be. The next thirty minutes of your life are going to be spent in this man's ear. You put a smile on and prepare.


Pretty much you have to take a squirt bottle, fill it with warm water and flush out the ear canal. Refer to the photo to the upper left, "Elephant Ear Washer". Yummy. 


The photo to the right is a rather less disgusting example of what comes out of people's ears. Sometimes it is black as tar, or looks like popcorn kernels. We have these nifty little spoons to "dig" the wax out too. 


Anyway, I have the weekend off. Make plans with me. 

I've been listening to The Blow lately. You should too. 

Hey boy, 

Why you didn't call me?

I waited for days, 

I can't believe you didn't call.

And we, sat outside for an hour at the party and talked.

I thought something good could be starting,

It's not a lot that I want, just some talking.
Really you just injured my pride. 

-The Blow Hey Boy

I got rear ended the other day, and not in the good way. Har-de-har. My POS car now looks even more like a POS. Maybe, one day, I'll stop dropping money trying to make myself smart and get a new car. One day, but for now, I'm going to rock it out with my dependable, broken and bruised 2002 Hyundai Elantra. HI-yun-DAY.

That was my first legit car accident. That's my first car too BTW. My baby for the past nine years. I've driven across the country twice in that thing, it's gotten me home when I really should not be driving. XOXO car. Woot. 

Okay. Homework time. Break it down. 

trying to save his suit, trying to save his suit.

It's Tuesday and I'm annoyed. I wrote a post a few weeks ago after I noticed a specific person deleted me off of Facebook, really pissed me off. I know, it sounds stupid, but I feel I was deleted because someone else has been giving off a biased view of me and my decisions. I went on a rant about waiting to judge someone until you know the entire story, like for instance what was going on in my life in 2009. Ever think there was a reason I was not mentioned? Ever think that maybe, just MAYBE you're wrong. It's not fair.

I also went on about how I was sick of putting in all of the effort for relationships or friendships. I'm done. It's funny, people I thought I wanted in my life have brought nothing but headaches, guess I should start looking outside of the box when I decide to befriend someone. I love that I have this reputation as this UBER bitch. Hmm, ever reflect on your own actions?

Anyway, unlike most of you who are currently going to school, I am paying for my education out of MY pocket. Not yours. I applied to financial aid this year, for the first time. I was denied. DENIED. Funny considering I was unemployed in 2010 and the FAFSA is based on the prior year's taxes. I made $10,000 in 2010. DENIED. I do not get a tax refund for my two children, because I do not have any. I do not receive food stamps, never collected unemployment or welfare, never relied on the government for anything. NOTHING. DENIED. Apparently I have been doing something wrong. Does anyone want to be my baby's daddy? No strings attached, I'll just leach off the government and hopefully be able to get some help to go to school. I owe UCF $2200 for this semester. This is after paying $500 for books, and $600 for the chemistry class I was taking at LSCC, but had to drop due to not having enough time to breath. THANKS.


The week before last I worked Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, had Tuesday off. Worked Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Sunday off. Worked yesterday. Last Tuesday I did homework. All day. Sunday I studied Macroeconomics. Drove to UCF yesterday, after working all day, to take a Macroeconomics exam. Last Friday I left work at 5 instead of 7, came home, took a Pathophysiology exam and went to bed at 7pm. Woke up the next morning at 7am and went to work.

See the photo to the right? -> That's what I have to accomplish before Friday at 11pm. The other photo, of Baylee is my excuse as to why I have not started on my homework yet. There's a puppy where my book should be.

well maybe you should just drink a lot less coffee,
and never ever watch the 10 o'clock news.
maybe you should just kiss someone nice,
or lick a rock,
or both.

maybe you should just cut your own hair,
cause that can be so funny.
it doesn't cost any money,
and it always grows back.
hair grows even after you're dead.

-Ghost of Corporate Future Regina Spektor

Hopefully you clicked that link. <3

Time to shower and clean, and that homework crap.

Ginger Spice, Ginger Spice, hustle hard since Fisher Price.

If you know me, you are probably aware that I am slightly obsessed with teeth. I am not quite sure what the obsession stems from, maybe years of braces and extractions, head gear, palate expanders, rubber bands. I had 9 teeth extracted before I was 18, two were permanent teeth. So yeah, I technically do not have all of my teeth. Just had my sole wisdom tooth removed in December. Apparently I only had one. Oh, I bet you're so freaking interested in this post at the moment.

My other obsession is my skin. It sucks. I'll be 25 in a month and I break out like I'm 15. I've been taking doxycycline, which sucks, makes you nauseated as crap. I've been taking it before bed so I sleep through the nausea. I'm also using this retinoid creme called Tazorac. (That a link to a fellow blogger's Tazorac story.) Anyway, this stuff literally makes your skin peel off. I have to super scrub my face with a brush and with facial scrubs a couple of times a day to not look like a snake. One of the awesome side effects of this medication is that it is a powerful anti-wrinkle creme. Less breakouts and no wrinkles, right on. Also using a benzoyl-peroxide/clindamycin creme during the day. Anyway, my skin is barely broken out. Most people would be freaking if they had half of the zits that I currently have, but I am like SCORE! :) Please let this keep up.

So, yeah. My face currently does not look like any of those photos. Yay. That's why I'm obsessed. Now I just need to get obsessed with going to the gym.

I'm chasing that neon rainbow, living that honky tonk dream.

I just finished a four day stretch at work yesterday, I have today off and I go back for three more tomorrow. I would not be complaining if the dreaded winter had not arrived. The snow birds seem to be making the trek to Florida and they all happen to get sick. We close at 5pm on Saturdays and Sundays, this Sunday we left at 6:45pm. We close at 7pm during the week (except Wednesdays). Yesterday I left the office in the villages at 8:20pm or so. Got home after 9pm. Working four in a row is not too bad when you get out on time. I worked every weekend in the month of October too. Awesome. This weekend is my first weekend off since September.

So, yes, today is my day off. I started my period this morning. Awesome. My face is extremely broken out, imagine that, so I just took a doxycycline, now I'm nauseated. Like extremely nauseated. Just took ginger supplements, I have phenergan, but I have to do homework and that crap will make me pass out. 

Enough bitching. My sister was in town for a couple of days and we made the most of it. Her friend Jessica and I met her at Orlando International Airport on Tuesday around 11:30pm. Jess and I had a couple of Mike's Hard Lemonades and were thoroughly enjoying driving in circles waiting for Amanda to get off the plane. We went to I-bar and danced like fools the rest of the night. Good times. The next day we had a bonfire. Took a break on Thursday and went to a kick-ass Halloween party on Friday. Partied like rock-stars. I paid for Friday night, Saturday. Working on 3 hours of sleep and too much beer is not ideal. :/

Sorry this is not extremely entertaining, felt like I needed to blog about why I have not had time to blog.